Dating is kind of like a game, at least in my experience: It’s a lot of figuring out how to talk to a cute person without fumbling over your words or ticking them off; after that comes sustaining their interest in you while making sure to honor your own needs too.
It’s hard, and I’m not good at it. But getting better at it, like most games, involves practice — like learning how to be flexible, compromising and, most importantly, supportive.
Self-proclaimed dating coach Richard La Ruina professes to be an authority on the dating game. And from that body of knowledge comes Super Seducer, now available on PC, which translates the trials and errors of dating into a choose-your-own-adventure-style video game. Hosted by La Ruina, it’s an episodic, live-action visual novel that preaches the importance of social cues and civility to relationship-building — for men, specifically.
“In fact, Super Seducer is more than a game, it’s a fantastic learning tool while still being fun, with the correct choices being rewarded while the wrong ones are punished,” said La Ruina in a note to press. “Rather than passively learning, this active approach, combined with immediate feedback, makes this the ultimate seduction trainer.”
As a lady who’s dated some very awkward dudes, I know we all could benefit from some self-improvement. But Super Seducer stumbles recklessly over the line between encouraging straight men to be conscious of how they treat straight women and instructing them on how to single-mindedly pursue women as if they were collectibles.
Each of Super Seducer’s levels play out as dialogue choice-based, interactive scenes. Richard (the “actor”) zeroes in on a girl in the hope of getting her number and ultimately into his bedroom. But that part comes later and, thankfully, happens off-screen. The primary focus of Super Seducer is navigating dating’s introductory steps. That means a lot of laborious small talk to respond to, with each choice followed by La Ruina (the “host”) either praising or disparaging what you said to the woman you’re after.
It sounds a lot like a dating sim, and in some ways, it is. But La Ruina’s interstitials convey the true motive of each conversation. A scene in which Richard is hanging out with an old friend he’s into features La Ruina encouraging the player to choose the cool, coy options. You don’t want this girl who you may have a chance to sleep with to think you’re desperate, after all. If you follow his lead, you’ll cut back to La Ruina in his hosting position: the edge of a hotel bed, flanked by two women in lingerie.
The first time that pops up, it’s laughable. But then those blank-stared ladies keep on appearing, lying on the bed like lazy cats. When at least every set of dialogue choices includes something like whipping out your dick, it becomes clear that sex is on the brain. La Ruina at least discourages his in-scene avatar from doing that, or asking a girl home too early — but the operative word there remains “too early.” That’s made all the more clear when you respond the wrong way and cut back to La Ruina, now alone in his hotel room.
He doesn’t say it outright, but he sure does look like he misses those cats of his.
When Richard gives a so-so answer to a girl — maybe he keeps going on and on about his job instead of complimenting her eyes and hair or whatever — La Ruina kind of shrugs as his lady friends play with their nails in nightgowns this time. These images look like archaic Playboy parodies. Even if that’s the point, it’s hard to see them as facetious or playful when the main game’s premise is to get women to sleep with you.
La Ruina dances around how his tactics are intrusive and dangerous, instead leaning on the refrain that Super Seducer is meant to be taken lightheartedly.
“I consider it more toward the [2005 romantic comedy] Hitch end of the scale in dating coaching, meaning just helpful psychological advice,” he told The Verge in an interview, noting that he anticipates players to be men who “want my dating advice, but also the men out there that might buy it because it looks funny.”
He also emphasizes that the female cast and crew members approved of the content, and that development began before the current wave of outspokenness against harassment. But pre-release impressions and previews have still called out Super Seducer for its bald-faced sleaziness.
“My team and I were honestly surprised by the extent of the backlash,” said La Ruina in a statement on launch day. “We worked hard to ensure that the message of the game was morally positive — to show that being honest is the best way to interact with women of interest and that lying and disrespectful behavior is wrong. There are many deceitful and manipulative techniques in the men’s dating field, and nothing like that is included.”
But anyone on the receiving end of La Ruina’s tactics wouldn’t find comfort in this. Look no further than the continuing tide of movements like #MeToo and #TimesUp for a sense of how many women have been in situations with men whose endgames are clear. It’s one thing to be quickly complimented in a bar or on the street, but even that can ring the alarm for those of us who’ve felt trapped on the other end of a hustle like the ones La Ruina advocates.
There’s definitely some fun to be had at first with making a live-action avatar talk about his dick with abandon. But there’s always an awareness of the discomfort the woman sitting across from Richard must feel — or will eventually feel — as he eggs her on or chips away at her defenses. We have those defenses up for a reason: The dating game is a challenge, and it’s one that us women stand to lose more often than not.
Update: Motherboard reports that Super Seducer will no longer come to PlayStation 4 as originally expected. The game remains available on PC via Steam, however.