I’m not convinced I’ve ever seen a good song on it before. I remember liking the Russian 2007 entry more than anything else I’ve witnessed on Eurovision, though. It seemed like they’d put more effort into getting a song together than naming it. “Song 1” is not a good name.

I didn’t know there were Eurovision drinking games, to be honest.

I haven’t seen that picture in ages! Lenin really took an inhuman amount to die, though. Three strokes, a gunshot wound, the stress of heading Russia in a civil war, if the guy had lived a normal life he’d probably only be having a midlife crisis now.

Apparently so! Next time you see frogs, remember: they’re fighting against the bureaucracy.

Seriously though, it took me by surprise that they represented laws as well. I figured they were just, well… lily pads. Nope, turns out they’re laws! The picture with the red things that have pink eyes also shows the bureaucrats. They’re those things. Scarier than Silent Hill, I’ll tell you.

Despite your confusion the gameplay mechanics are straightforward enough. Move around. Don’t fall into the ocean of… what does the ocean represent? Avoid the nasty bureaucrats and collect consumer goods and taxes. #TopTips.

Have you tried the more goofy stuff? Some people get their kicks from playing subclasses, like the Trolldier (Rocket jump around the map, hit people with the Market Gardener) or the Pyroshark (Neon Annihilator in water). If you really want to get into the game, try and get into the community side of it. There are some strong communities and some great servers as a result. Get hooked on one part of the game, and the rest might come with it. It might not, but if you do want to give it a chance, that might be the easiest way.

I think they’re holding back on weapons because at this point, it’s hard to make something new and balanced at the same time. They could do more reskins (i.e. AWPer Hand and Stock Sniper rifle), but not everyone is going to find those too enticing. I don’t really consider the Original a pure reskin, since the rockets do come from the centre instead of the right of the screen.

The most recent new weapons were the Loose Cannon and the Vaccinator, as far as I am aware. The Loose Cannon is a niche and the Vaccinator, while potentially very effective, is neglected for the Kritzkrieg and the stock Medigun. I suppose it’s not entirely surprising, and I’d like to see more weapons myself, but I don’t think they’d be easy to include and make people want to buy them. It’s a shame because variety is nice.

Could do! It’s what I’ve done with Warband, but I do like the convenience of having all my games on Steam.

Not bad! I haven’t had a chance to play Driver: Parallel Lines in ages. The only downside to no DRM is that I can’t retrieve it through Steam in the future. Call me a bringer of more draconian DRM in future, but I’m lazy.

I feel that I am the best representative of potato bread on the site at the moment. Shaun is also eligible for this role. Madness? No, this is insanity. devolves into maniacal laughter

Ahem. It’s warm bread. Thought it might be beneficial to let you know people have fired things on top of it. ;)

It’s not just crazy, it’s crazy good. If you can find it, I highly recommend it. You can microwave it for about 20 or 30 seconds, or you can fry it. Either way it’s highly recommended. You can also put butter onto it, if butter is a key part of your bread diet. Oh, and some people out there have put jam/marmelade on it.

More than anything else, I’m surprised nobody from Ireland has tried putting a potato onto it.

You’ve done it before as well? I commend you on your enthusiasm for all things bread. Sometimes you just need it so badly there’s no time for butter. Perhaps not even for cutting it. Just ingest the glory as quickly as possible, right?

“In some cases, reality is more crazy than myth.”

It’s maybe not the best example of myth, but it is a crazy bit of reality, and it was only reported fairly recently. It’s even about spying and espionage, though from East Germany in particular. Historic sentiment is always worth looking at. I actually wrote a bit on the forums about the Soviet policy of perestroika and a game it spawned, which is rather oddly timed with this article being published.

Polygon always seems to keep me up-to-date with smaller indie games. I wouldn’t have known about CounterSpy without that, so thanks for bringing this game to my attention. I’m a sucker for anything Cold War related.

This man gets it! It’s warm, it’s bread, it’s potato. And it tastes like victory.

I’ve never had blueberry bread before! I like blueberries though so I should probably find some at some time. Here in Northern Ireland (and I think Scotland has it as well), we’ve got potato bread. You heat it up, and you eat it with/without butter. We will potato anything.

It’s good. If you find that you should buy it as well!

Sometimes I don’t even put butter on it. Very rarely, but I’ve done it before. I’ve also watched a guy eat one of those really long baguettes in one sitting without any spread on it. Bread is serious business.

I’ve done the same thing before. Good bread doesn’t even need filling.

Crusts could be darker. This is an 8/10 loaf.

I haven’t played this game yet (as I write this comment I’m downloading the demo), but this article really has me convinced it’ll be good. The Soviet Union is one of my historic passions. It sounds like there was a huge amount of work put into this game and everything about it. I can respect that, and now it looks like I’m going to have to play it.

Oh, and it’s currently £9.99 on Steam. If this demo wins me over, I’m buying the entire thing, guaranteed. As always, props to Polygon’s design team for the article layout. It looks great.

All I know about Singapore is that it’s a good ally in Civilization V since it’s Mercantile, and I like money.

Guys, you know I’d never lie to you. I just… I just wanted to paint on the walls of Babylon. Is that too much for a man to ask?! I’m also a terrible rapper in my spare time, with lines like those being a key part of my delivery. You never said you’ve done better, right? Technically still the most legit poet-slash-painter on the site.

I am Paulygon,
Someday I’ll paint upon
the walls of Babylon…

I’m sorry man. You have my sincerest condolences, and I wish there was more I could do for you. We’re all here if we can be any help, mate. As much as I hate this saying, keep your head up. We’ll be right here, all the way.

Happy birthday! Hopefully it’s a great day!

Which map? There’s one in Pripyat called Hidden or something of that nature.

Using a glitch, you used to be able to get outside the boundaries of the map and wander round a good bit. Some of the buildings were even accessible, and they had Call of Duty 2 posters and artwork in them. Even now I have no idea why, but I remember there was an area that looked a bit like the map Bloc as well. Maybe it was the map Bloc, I’m not sure. But I haven’t played MW2 in forever so I have no idea if you’re still able to get out there.

I own a Das. It’s a pretty lush keyboard. Any idea which switches you want? It was mentioned on their Facebook page that Red switches are meant to be coming. I’d source it, but that’d mean hunting through Facebook. If you’re not into super-light switches with no tactile bump or click, then the Reds are no big deal.

I have the pre-media key Das. It’s a good, hefty bit of kit. Just get yourself a microfibre cloth because the piano black finish and your fingerprints are going to become friendly.

I was wondering what you meant for a few seconds, but you’re absolutely right. None of the stuff in that promotional image will come to you in that medium.

I’ve heard of quite a few of these performers, but not all of them are things I’d willingly go to a concert for. I’d rather not hear Beyonce or 2 Chainz. I have no real opinion on NIN; they seem to have some tracks I like and some I don’t ‘get’. Kendrick Lamar was in Dublin not too long ago and one of my friends was absolutely devastated he missed out on that, though.

I haven’t played Black Ops 2, but in the older games (not including MW3 here since I played the MP for all of 20 minutes) I always felt you could play at any pace and still have some success. My friends and I have played super-tactical games and also ones where we just rush around with SMGs cutting down anything with a pulse. The newer games might be very different but the older ones allowed some freedom here.