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Are you ready to pay the ultimate price for VR?

Stop it.

By which I mean "the entirety of your sense of self worth"? I'm not personally, but that hasn't seemed to deter AirVR, which has launched a Kickstarter to fund a gadget that lets you strap your iPad Mini or iPhone 6 Plus to your face and be whisked away to virtual reality. This new reality is, by definition, better than your actual reality, because your actual reality is apparently one in which you've given up to an extent that you're willing to strap an iPad to your god damn face.

Look at this guy:


That guy is about 95 percent more Gosling than myself. Can you imagine swapping out his perfectly scruffy jawline for the undulating cream pie that is my face? Can you even imagine?

This is an actual line from the AirVR Kickstarter page:

Virtual Reality is finally within our reach. But cost, availability, and a lack of content have kept it from becoming a part of everyday life, until now.

Oh? Are those the only factors? There isn't like, this one other factor? Hold on, I feel like it's right in front of my face.


Oh, that's right. It's that even this seemingly cool guy is terminally Urkeled the moment he straps this thing on.

Listen, I can hear some of you skipping to the comments right now ready to defend AirVR under the pretext that this is really for home use where you won't be seen looking like Geordi La Forge's financially destitute cousin.

I don't care if I'm home alone, locked in my bunk in a secret, abandoned moon base and the rest of the crew of the LUNAR-1 has been dead for decades. Like, what if there's a ghost in there? I wouldn't let a ghost see me strap an iPad to my face, especially not the ghost of Barbara from moon accounting (you know how judgy she always was).

If you do decide to kick in the CA$49 for the basic set, be sure to set aside a few extra bucks for a jumbo Sharpie, as you'll want to make a permanent update to your iPad.


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