Behold! The world's first literal Steam Machine

Welp, ThinkGeek committed the greatest of April Fools' Day sins: The online retailer created a fake product that we want to buy.

This $399.99 Steam Machine is fantasy, but we wish it weren't. Who wouldn't want a state of the art miniature boiler mechanism that creates enough steam to power a wooden gaming device? Sure, we're going to have to find out where to get a truckload of anthracite coal. And there's the problem with, you know, ventilation. But you can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs.

And now that we think about it, the combustible fuel might probably generates enough heat to make cooking easy.