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While some of you may find The Witness to be a pleasurable challenge, those of us living our lives as stupid people are lucky just to keep our heads above water. Hell, I beat the game and still manage to get stuck, as you'll see in the 11-minute video above.
I've endeavored to keep the video as free of spoilers as possible, but honestly, if you're desperate enough to crib off of my paper, you should probably play any other game.