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Bowsette is never going to happen, Nintendo says

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At least we’ll always have the glorious, glorious fan art

Super Mario Odyssey - Bowser with a captured Peach Nintendo EPD/Nintendo

In September, Super Mario fans asked a huge question: If Toadette can become Princess Peach clone Peachette just by donning a crown in New Super Mario Bros. U Deluxe, could other characters also become pretty princesses? Could Bowser become Toadstool royalty — perhaps named Bowsette?

Polygon’s own investigation into the matter sadly bore no fruit. Now, a week ahead of the Switch game’s launch, Nintendo has answered the question for us.

There is no Bowsette.

“When Toadette finds one of these [Super Crown items], she can transform into the super-powered Peachette,” the game’s official site reads, per a screenshot on ResetEra. But only Toadette may wear the Super Crown, Nintendo adds.

A screenshot of Super Crown details
The truth comes out.
Nintendo

Strangely, Nintendo then throws in an aside: “(Sorry Luigi — only Toadette can use this item!)” Luigi-ette was thankfully never a social media phenom, unlike Bowsette. But no matter; this is the confirmation we sought out that our beautiful Koopa-fied Peach is but a dream deferred.

The Bowsette-less New Super Mario Bros. U Deluxe launches on Jan. 11. But we hope that Bowsette lives on in all of our hearts — and Tumblr dashboards — if nothing else.