Avengers: Endgame is three hours and one minute long. For viewers with tiny bladders but giant investments in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, that might sound like the comic book movie equivalent of an ultramarathon. And unlike, say, Quentin Tarantino’s The Hateful Eight from a few years back, there’s no intermission to alleviate the pressure. Directors Anthony Russo and Joe Russo want audiences to buckle up and remain seated. The flight will get turbulent.
How are you going to make it? Let’s be realistic: Even with all the bombast, your early morning or late-night screening (“It was the only times they had on opening weekend!”) may force you to imbibe a large caffeinated beverage. Unless you want your post-movie moment of relief to feel like you’re passing an Infinity Stone, you’ll likely want to take a break from the action — but not in the middle of any literal action. So when do you go?
People on the internet who’ve seen the movie early aren’t in total agreement on this subject. Being a democratic bunch, we here at Polygon have decided to gather all the intel and rank the divisive scenes based on pee-break-worthiness. We’ll only break these scenes down with the lightest of spoilers (so if you’re going in 100% blind, consider going in 100% flushed as well), but if you’re a fan of certain characters, and want to make sure you’re feeling the stakes, trust us: You want options.
Here’s our take, in descending order:
8. A scene between Tony and Pepper in which they talk about life
In the first act of the movie, roughly 45 minutes in, Mr. Stark and the person keeping him alive all these years have a nice chat about life. There’s a lot of tension in the world after Thanos’ snapped 50 percent of the universe’s population into nonexistence, and the weight sits on Tony’s shoulders. We won’t say more than that, but ScreenCrush recommends you “run like hell” during this moment so you don’t miss any of the scenes with more momentum later in the film. I take slight issue with the recommendation: The scene is really lovely! And if anything’s been missing over the last 21 movies, it’s sweet character moments like these. Hold it!
7. Ant-Man and Hulk eat lunch
CNET says, one hour into the movie, you should take full advantage of one of Endgame’s more trivial, humorous moments — the scene involves tacos — to run to the bathroom. I see the site’s point: We don’t learn anything more about Thanos, Infinity Stones, or the intricate plot that will resolve the events of Infinity War in this scene. But it’s also hilarious, and the levity may be worth suffering from bladder cramps. Be strong.
6. Nebula arrives to a place in space
Early on in the second act of the film, Nebula finds herself traversing the galaxy (minus most of her Guardians pals, since they got snapped). GameSpot thinks this is the time to go, and they’re probably on to something: Karen Gillan has a lot to do in Endgame, and most of it is gripping, but this is her deep breath moment.
5. When Thor basically recaps Thor: The Dark World
Around the 50- to 55-minute mark, the Avengers find themselves doing a lot of expositional heavy lifting to make sure you know what the hell is about to happen. Mashable suggests grabbing a hall pass and ducking out of the history lesson. If you have watched the first Thor sequel recently, go when the God of Thunder takes the stage. If you haven’t, you should cross your legs and open your ears.
4. Ronin makes his entrance
IGN suggests running out of the theater about 50 minutes into Endgame, during a scene that’s been teased heavily in the trailers: the blade-spinning reveal of Ronin aka Pissy Hawkeye. Sorry, not pissy — he didn’t drink a 47-liter Coke before he embarked on his adventure. Perturbed Hawkeye. The scene is mostly tangential action, so if Hawkeye isn’t your Hawkguy, definitely take off during his intro.
3. When a “New Jersey” title card comes up
Maybe you thought you could make it through the entire movie without a bathroom break. Good for you! Maybe you thought you could and you couldn’t. No shame. In the final third of the movie, CNET recommends you bolt out of your chair as soon as the chyron title “New Jersey” hits the screen. You were probably already thinking of doing that — Jersey, ammaright? — but this is because Endgame is slow-building to some serious character payoff moments. If you’re quick, you’ll see the beats that really matter. Or you can take off early, as a scene set in New York winds down. (But we understand why you’d want to stay for every second of a New York scene — what a town, ammaright?)
2. The Paul Rudd method
During an interview with Jimmy Kimmel, Ant-Man actor Paul Rudd recommended you scrap leaving the theater for a bathroom break altogether and just pee in your giant tub of popcorn. Honestly, you’ll think about it as soon as Endgame really gets going. There’s a reason we’re all taking this urination talk seriously.
1. A moment too spoilery to talk about, but it’s set in space and there’s a been-there-done-that vibe
The official Polygon curveball: there’s a big scene midway through the movie and ... well, if we said anything more you’d crush us with your giant purple hands. All you need to know is that the scene is approximately five to 10,000 minutes long (i.e. it goes on forever), which means you can run and be back before the important stuff happens.
Go have fun and practice good fluid intake!