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Lego has created a classy Batman Returns set, in a targeted attack on me personally

Please, mom, it’s the only thing I want for my birthday

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Lego’s Batcave Shadow Box set sits closed on a wooden table. It’s shaped like a wide, tall box, with a “cutout” of the batsymbol on the front, through which can be seen an intricate Lego diorama of the Batcave from Batman 1989. A person wearing orange sits in the background. Image: Lego/Warner Bros.

The Lego Group’s latest Batman-themed set is the 3,981 piece “Batman Returns” Batcave Shadow Box. Rude.

Builders can painstakingly assemble a miniature replica of the Batcave, inspired by 1992’s Batman Returns, with working lights, multiple little movable bits like a hidden costume display and batarang cabinet, and a “feature rich” Batmobile that can be detached from the set. I’m fuming.

When assembly is finished, the set hinges closed into a 20-inch-wide, 11-ish-inches-tall box, through which the Batcave can still be seen in a cutout shaped like the bat symbol itself. The “Batman Returns” Batcave Shadow Box will be made available for Lego VIPs starting June 5 at Lego’s site and LEGO Stores. It’ll be available for the general public starting June 8, priced at $449.99. The unmitigated gall.

The “Batman Returns” Batcave Shadow Box Lego set, unfolded to show it’s Batcave replica interior with removable Batmobile, sitting on a credenza. Image: Lego/Warner Bros.

The set also includes seven minifigures inspired by Batman Returns, including brand new figures of Catwoman and the Penguin. I, however, will be replacing all of them in display with my complete set of The Lego Batman Movie minifigures, when the “Batman Returns” Batcave Shadow Box becomes available shortly after my actual birthday. Thank you for reading.

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