Unarmed and Dangerous: A Skyrim Journal - Part 1


Diary Entry One

My name is Jibba Jabba. I am Khajiit. This is my journal, of my time in Skyrim.

The Rules:

1. Fists and non-destructive magic only

2. No houses, carry all equipment all times

3. One life, death is the end

Bad Starts

Jibba wake up on cart. I am tied up with other men. I do not know these men. They say I am being taken to Helgen to be executed for some reason, Jibba not really listening. They take Jibba to block, to kill me with axe. Pitiful man with axe, cannot kill with his own two hands, I spit on him. Before pitiful man make his cowardly strike, great beast appears, shattering eardrums with his cry. Jibba ran, ran as hard as I could. Took refuge in tower. As I climbed, wall shattered, and dragon-beast stuck his head inside. Beast flew off, and as Jibba approach hole, beast returned, and scorched Jibbas fur. Jibba decide enough is enough, and jump from tower to safety.


Meet up with Stormcloak man, hide in building. Man frees Jibba, and I took nearby armor, as dragons serious business. We fight our way through the tunnels, Imperial captors falling at every step. Jibba take heavier armor from slain foe, to protect his fur from dragons. Jibba also try his combat moves on Imperial fools, using ancient art of suplex to dispatch them.

We reach lower caves of Helgen, and Jibba proves his mettle against nest of spiders, all falling to my claws. We also see a bear, and cowardly compatriot insists on avoiding it. Jibba avoids no challenge, and I dispatched the bear with three quick punches. Was good fight, bear was worthy opponent. Soon, we reach exit of silly caves.

To Riverrun

Free of silly caves, man tells Jibba to meet with him in Riverrun, small town nearby. Jibba makes tracks fast, engaging in combat with many foxes and rabbits on way. Jibba eat their flesh raw, all the goodness right to stomach. After wrong turn, end up halfway up mountain ridge, so carefully hop down treacherous terrain to reach small town. Jibba hurt knees on way down, silly mistake, no excuses. Thankfully, town is right at bottom of fall, and Jibba has reached his destination.


Town is smaller than Jibba thought. Jibba speak to nearby smith man, who shows Jibba the ways of the smith. Jibba thanked man, sell him useless gear collected so far, and used forge to improve armor. Jibba seek out lady, who thank Jibba for information about dragon, and give him free pie. Jibba eat pie, as one should never refuse a free pie. She say that Jarl in Whiterun is man to speak to about dragon. She also say that Hod man in charge of work, so Jibba talk to Hod man, who gives Jibba job.


The work is simple, and Jibba excel at it. After chopping much wood, Hod gives Jibba his pay, and it is not a good wage. Decided this was a bad way to spend time, so decided to make tracks for Whiterun. Whiterun far away, and Jibba get lost twice on way. Fight lots of silly wolves, ganging up on lonesome Jibba. Wolves not reckon with power of fists, and all fall down. After long walk, with much pain and suffering, Jibba reach destination.

Exploring Whiterun


Whiterun seem impressive from distance. Jibba more than a little interested in city, so head down slopes to approach. Halfway down, more silly wolves ambush, and are put down fast. City guard assist, using pointy stick, a weapon of the weak. Jibba enter city, and look for place to sell assorted nonsense collected so far, Jibba want light pockets. Head to nearest shop, run by man called Belethor. Waited outside for two hours, man not there.


Jibba bore of waiting for silly shop man, and explore town. Find local Hall of Dead, with weak priest man inside. Priest man scared of own catacombs, says dead walk, and have his holy item. Jibba not scared. Jibba enter and meet walking bone-bags. One punch from Jibba enough to end the threat of skeletons, Jibbas strength proven again. Man thankful for amulet, and Jibba seek out shop again.

Shop finally open, at 2pm in the afternoon. What a lazy town is Whiterun. All rubbish sold to Belethor man, and he advises of local bandits causing problems. Jibba can solve this problem, and vowed to defeat these bandits to prove own worth. Jibba grab new armor from nice smith lady by gates, and head out to deal with bandit men.

Bandit Hunting

After brief run, found what looked to be bandit men. There seemed to be two, and Jibba take them out before they even draw silly weapons. Hah, proves the strength of the fist! As Jibba looked around camp, three more ambush like sissy children. Two swing big slow axes at Jibba, and are swiftly avoided and relieved of their lives. The last bandit is lizard man, throwing electric spells at Jibba. Spell hurts, but not as much as Jibbas revenge, and lizard man fell just like rest. Jibba line up men to easily sort out what could be salvaged.


Turns out, much good gear to sell, so Jibba take it all. Leave the small clothes, Jibba have no need for those. Happy with days work, Jibba check out the bounty notice that shop man give. Calamity! Jibba has killed wrong bandits! Annoyed at self for mistake, head back to town to rest for night, it has been long day.