Pokémon are capable of a great many things, but if there’s one thing they lack, it’s a set of epic chompers. After all, how can they perform a proper Bite attack when most of them just seem to have gummy maws.
In this installment of Polygon Draws, the staff has been tasked with depicting their favorite Pokémon, albeit sporting human teeth. Finally one of the biggest mistakes The Pokémon Company made has been righted and we can all go on with our lives.
All of the artists are listed below, along with statements on what inspired them to create such masterworks.
“I’ve spent a lot of time in my life looking at Blastoise, and so this is the best Polygon Draws drawing I will ever produce. It’s also the only way I know how to draw teeth, so this challenge worked in my favor.”
“Many people asked me why I included lips on this Bulbasaur. To be frank, I was confused why the other artists did not include lips. To me, lips are a delivery system for teeth. If teeth were cargo, lips would be the train carrying them into the mouth station. I am not trying to be controversial, this is simply what I believe.”
“Basically I thought: Why stop at teeth?”
“I had a lovely Weepingbell in Pokémon: Let’s Go that I named Robert. I’d like to think that Robert is now able to live out his omnivorous desires, instead of having to subsist on meager sunlight. I’m so happy for Robert.”
“Is it blood or gums? Maybe both. That’s for you to decide.”
“That’s where the teeth go.”
“I have a mouth and i must scream.”
“Slowpoke wasn’t my favorite as a kid, but as I’ve aged I’ve found I relate more and more to this slothful Pokémon’s laid-back style. So yes, the tail stripe, mouth, and lazy eyes aren’t correct, but that’s just my tribute to Slowpoke’s chill attitude. Like, whatever dude.”
“I hope that Charmander’s commitment to caring for his unexpectedly human teeth will serve as an inspiration to us all.”
“I realize now that I like rabbit-eared Pokémon. I’m also realizing now that all Pokémon designs would be improved with a set of dentures.”